Jack Kerouac, as Sal Paradise once said: "I like too many things and get all confused and hung-up running from one falling star to another till i drop. This is the night, what it does to you. I had nothing to offer anybody except my own confusion." And I think that's a rather apt description of my blog over the years, and perhaps the most perfect description of me in general that I've ever read. So that's what this blog is, a collection of the falling stars that are beckoning me at any time.
23 August 2005
Things worked out for the best for once and that freshman comp class I was worried that I was going to have to take because of a a mixup involving recieving credit for my AP exam at my first college but not this one. All is therefore fixed and I'm all good to go for degree application.
20 August 2005
As much as it would suck this would not be the crisis that it is right now if my parents had helped me out on last semester's tuition, especially since I had a hard time finding work when I got back. As it was I spent the entire summer putting forth my measly earnings toward paying off Spring semester and the extra 200 in late fees I had because I couldn't pay by in time for the billing dates. (this wouldn't be exactly the bone of contention in me were it not for the fact that my narly 25 year old brother who's never worked a day in his life, is still completely supported by them financially and has his tuition paid for what is going on the same exact number of years in school once you take into account the fact that I took the 3 years off to get my shit together in Connecticut.
But, I guess there's no use getting stressed about it until I speak to an advisor to do my official senior check which hopefully I'll take care of Monday, after all a little computer trying to randmonly do your degree check isn't going to really be able to do the figuring where it comes to all those credits from Emerson that don't match up to anything here.
But I digressed, I was talking about web boutiques, only I'm no longer in the mood to rant about what a complete waste of important marketing buzz it is to be listed amongst the vendors on the site for a pretty large sized independent design and arts colective sale, and not even have a brief page put up to talk up your wares and where people can get them or offer a mailing list when you do get a shop up and running. I know this whole "diy" movement seems to have taken on the air that no one should look like they care about making a dime nor should they look like they know their head from their arse when it comes to having any kind of business sense because that might take on that consumerist edge if you admitted you'd like to possibly make a living off your creative talents, but, for pete's sake, in a burgeoning industry that's really starting to take on the tinge of glut, you should at least know enough to know that getting your name and vision out there and as much as possible is more and more vital to your survival. If you are serious enough about your products and art to apply and pay into being a part of the event, then you should care enough to put up at least some kind of homepage, if for nothing else so that after the event you can keep customers who are keen to supprt your work and buy more stuff in the future informed of where you get places to carry your stuff or when you have new stuff. In fact if you're serious enough to do a major event like this your web store or page shouldn't look like you let a chimp with lou gehrig's disease design it. I mean you don't have to go get some fancy graphic design firm do it up, that wouldn't be very independent (Yes I have a real pet peeve about the misuse of the term "diy." It's diy if you decide to put in your own sink instead of having a plumbing contractor do it, it's diy if you see a Marc Jacob's dress that you think is absolutely the most beautiful thing ever and so you whip up a pattern yourself and recreate it or at least somehting similar, it's diy if you think spending 20 buck on a wallet at some lame mall chain store so you just design and make your own. It is not diy if you design something, produce it in a small edition or as a one of a kind item with the intetions of selling it, that is being an independent small retailer. The reason I dislike the misuse of the term isn't just nit-pickery for me, it's something I see as a belittling of not only the people who put in the work and effort into producing these goods, but as something which is an instrument of big business and and behemoth retailors to subvert mass consumption backlash. I think that as a culture of craft and the tendency of our business ventures in goods that aren't mass produced and entirely machine made to have risen out of a love of crafts that we started as a hobby, we take on the term without really considering the implications that the word puts over our goods. DIY is a term that implies a lack of professionalism, that what is produced is the result of a casual hobby. I know we can all raise our hands and admit to having had at least one occaision where when asked about something we either made or bought from someone who handmakes their items when we brought up that it was handmade or diy, we were treated to a comment expressing surprise that it "almost looks good enough to have come from a store" as though if it weren't made by some 12 year old Cambodian for 2 cents a day in a room with no ventilhation it can only be inferiour. Handmade used to be the mark of real quality, it's a notion that seems to have died off about the time that we stopped calling people milliners and artisans.
To me all of the wonderful things out there for sale by people who decided to pursue that dream of selling thier creations to the world, the only thing diy about them is their ethos. That spirit of screw you corporate media, you can't tell us how to think, feel or what to like, and if you won't put out our records, if you won't give us magazine content that has substance and interest, if you won't design clothes that fit our real selves and not some ideal you try to feed us, if you won't give us what we actually want instead of what you're trying to tell us we should want then we will, like the people who founded your damn companies back when they had 5 employees that they actually viewed as people and not disposable machines that they try to cover their disdain for by giving them inflated sounding names to make it seem like they really do care about you, take that risk that there are others who share our views and tastes and make our own damn company, or magazine, or record label, or movie production company and the world will probably be a better place for it.
Right so that was a soapbox full :) I tend to be the sort of person who gets an opinion and gets it passionately, I'd have been great in the old days of fiery stump speeches and riding around in the back of locomotives campaigning. I'm too long winded for our soundbite times though I fear.
18 August 2005
I saw photos of other moustache softies on plush rush which is another one of those things I'd love to submit to and participate in, but there are so many people out there with far better sewing skills and experience than me, so odds on getting aomething in is low enough that it hardly seems worth the bother. Morris will at least be happy to know htat he has stuffed moustache bretheren.
Today I ran across swank signs a photo collection of all the truly odd and wonderful public works signs from all over the globe, complete with an area for all the smart asses to invent funny captions or speculate just what was going through the warning sign makers' heads when they created something so odd. It's definitely a big bonus for the timewasters who like to laugh aout there.
15 August 2005
I stopped taking my paxil on Thursday, After over 2 years on it i feel it's time for a noble experiment in trying to manage my own emotions, after all I'm a very different person than the one who was talked into to taking anti depressents in the first place, my thought processes are a lot healthier. I know that the conventional advice is to ween yourself off them, but the idea of 6 months of hit or miss sickness from level lowering doesn't appeal to me, I'd rahter, it's true just take the month of withdrawal and be done with it. Right now that's not feeling like such a great plan as I am horribly ill with nausea and fatigue and those annoying power surge feelings in my head. What it does though is make me angry. Angry that i was lied to about how "oh paxil isn't habit forming, you'd just have a few side effects if you stopped like a potential increase in your original symptoms." It's bullshit, it's like saying well crack's not addictive, you'll just have some negative side effects if you don't smoke that next rock. I could really deal with my moods and emotions being a bit wonky for awhile as my brain makes the transition. That much would be fine. But, you know what, glaxo-smith kiline, or whoever you are, nowhere in the original symptoms of my depression did I feel like an electric surge went off in my head when I moved, did moving too much make me feel that i was going to vomit. I'm not going to go refill my prescription though, I've made it this far I'll just remain detirmined to deal with it for a little longer. (it might be one thing if I had health insurance to just abandon this detox, but I don't, so I've got to keep in mind that the worst part is probably half over now, and I've just got to be strong enough to make it to the slight discomfort stage and then I'm home free.)
So, alright this isn't a very crafty post or even artsy, but it does have a self portrait, so there's something. :)
14 August 2005
Obviously I go to museums, and I always find a lot of art that I'm really into when I go, I prefer to go to gallery showings far more than I like going to the Met or the Louvre however and the reason is that art museums don't really foster the kind of visceral experience with the art. Museums are all about hero worship of what a select few have decided are the artists and works that you simply must be excited about. There's no real sense of democracy or personal reaction to them. They say, these artists are simply the best, and that's how it is, we're the exclusive group. Museums seek to take art from the people and make it snobbish and exclusive and the artist who manages to get his or her works accepted is placed on a pedastal.
I think the reactions of the museums who were "hit" with Banksy works really speaks volumes to me about how removed from the common man and self enshrouded in an air of superiority the art world has become. The general feelings of those in the illustrious power seats viewed what Banksy had done as an affront to art, a slap in the face to the legacy of greatness, that how dare just anyone think they could hang a work in a museum for the public to see. But what could be more appropriate than "just anyone" hanging work in a museum? Doesn't it challenge us all to consider what exactly it is that makes a work of art something for all times and what makes it minor? Doesn't it inspire us to consider the whole nature of art and what it is? To consider all the groundbreaking rebelliousness of art particularly in the 20th century and beyond? I'm by no means saying that the works that Banksy hung are the kind of works that will endure for any length of time as great art (in fact I was less impressed with most of them than with the bulk of his graffitti pieces) but to me what was important and groundbreaking and art about what he did was the fact that he did it at all, it was the intorduction of populist pieces into the patrician world of illustrious museums, it was the attempt to shake up the neurons of the art spectator.
That's one of the things that I like about the guerrilla art movement, that much of it is really about getting people to take a peep outside their tunnel and really look once again at the world that actually surrounds them, to view for a minute the places they've trudged through everyday for ten years to the point that they don't even notice they are actually alive there anymore as a tourist does on his first visit, to interact with their lives again. It's about reclaiming one's life again in a world where we've given it up for habit and mechanisation.
You'll note that I really don't think that enough attention is being given to guerilla art, everyone is so damn focused on smooching up to 'outsider art' (a term which i hate to the ends of the earth)not that there aren't a lot of great outsider artists, but I think too much attention is paid to that, when there isn't even really any such thing as outsider art, this so called movement is built up of self-taught artists and folk artists, which are right there two serparate forms of art and not something you ought to just lump together under some pretentious word that someone thinks sounds better.
But anyway, yes I don't like museums because they foist an opinion on you about the works in them, and really never give you much of a feel into the world into which these works and movements sprung forth. And I like to form my own opinions, even if often they aren't at the same eye level as the critics :)
13 August 2005
(If there is one item of fashion that I will have no problem paying for it is the eyewear frame, since after all, the spectacle is so prominent that it really telegraphs your personality at first glance, one day I'll have a spec collection the way Manhattan socialiites have Jimmy Choo and Malo Blahnik shoe collections. And in actuality this frame happens to not be in the super pricey range, at least not on the site I found selling it, plus as blind as I am the painful part of buying specs is how much the lenses cost especially by the time you've got all the protective coatings and had the sides polished so it's not glaringly obvious that I wear coke bottles [also I'm not exaggerating, I've yet to find anyone who could beat me inthe battle of myopia, I'm -10.75 in both eyes, or at least was last time I got them proerly checked]. So it would seem that my only hard decision is whether I covet the red with black or the black with green frames more.)
These by the way are Alain Mikli, who is, at least in my estimation, the darling of eyewear design right now, having spectacular successful buzz at being behind those brilliant and gorgeous frames Cillian Murphy was wearing in Batman Begins.
you'll see he makes an excellent disguise for tharting the sheriff...
I know you're like, but Chloe, what the hell does that have to do with the wild west. Well to be honest when I think of the wild west the first thing I think of after cowboys, indians and cheap whores in red can can dresses is big droopy handle bar snidley whiplash moustaches. So I thought why not eschew the horse and cow and other more well known and probably #1 common picks and go with a portable stuffed moustache. (also it sort of reminds me of that episode of the Tick :))
I was originally thinking of making a jackalope, but I could never settle on a design I liked and since this project is supposed to be about fun and not frustration I decided to work on something else that I could get a suitable design out of.
12 August 2005
I've finally figured out what I'm making for MOS this month, whihc makes me happy because I've been hating every design I drew out for the last 2 weeks, finally I tried an old comedy writing brainstorm technique of just writing down a bunch of words and viola an idea was born.
Now I just need to come up with my theme for the double disc debacle and I am right back on creative track for the month.
10 August 2005
However, I have a massive attraction to a guy I've only corresponded with through the internet and it grows more giddy day by day, every time in fact I learn some new bit of trivia about his life and personality, because every time it is revealed even more randomly that he is more and more my type. He's admitted to having a large crush on me right back which only makes it worse. The trouble is he lives in the UK and I am of course here in the states. Even though it's true that I'm only tied to being here until I graduate in December and I am actually a British citizen as well as an american because my dad is from Wales, still that's a fact I try to push out of my head, I'm actually trying really very hard not to just let my brain run off on it's poetic flights of fancy and become totally stupid on the man, but damn it's hard to fight against one's natural tendency towards beautiful rash exuberance. (it's also hard to cousel oneself out of silly movie-esque ending scenarios, when one has knowledge of how random and simularly cinematic was the history that led to my existence in the first place. My dad was living and working in Bermuda, my mother went there on vacation with a friend of hers who had been asked out on a date by some other local guy, but would only agree to go as a double date so the guy, who worked with my dad, dragged my dad along and even though my mother said it was the worst date she'd ever been on and my dad had barely said a word the entire time, somehow it got to the point that they got married, he moved to the US, they had me and my little brother and they've been married 30 years. So really is meeting someone through a random internet site and a random email really all that far-fetched?)
Still the fight for emotional prudence is being waged, even though I suspect I'm going to lose out to my impetuous star-eyed nature.
09 August 2005
It's definitely a week for brainstorming. I'm still not sure what I want to do for this month's month of softies, despite living currently in one of those cowboy sort of towns I'm not a very western country sort of person. About the only thing I was ever enamoured with in the old west was the idea of making a house out of sod. Ok, and that indian hole with the rock over it in the native craft book that used to be in my house. (I think it was given up to the goodwill after I ignored all the actual crafts in it and decided to dig a big hole in the yard to hide from bears.) I also need to decide on my theme for the dual disc debacle so I can start to pick out songs for it.
I finally broke down and signed up with netflix, I'm excited that around tomorrow the Godfrey Reggio series should be arriving. I've seen Nagoyqatsi once before, but I'm excited to watch all 3 together.
02 August 2005
I've been wicked obsessed with watching cash in the attic on BBC of late, even though I get really irritated that every episode their first lots will do smashingly well and then they'll have like one item that comes in 5 pounds under and they'll act like oh no there's no way they'll make their target now. which is kind of annoying. I just love that the one valuer's name is Jaunty, someties I think that cant' possibly be any gorwn man's name, perhaps it's really John T. but then it would be quite off that they call him John T all the time instead of just John, so it must be Jaunty.
01 August 2005
No dissertation on art today simply some of the work of one of my favourite artists Maija Fiebig. I actually discovered her art on one of my link trolling days when I was flipping through the goods that Velocity had to offer. volocity's Maija Fiebig pages
Now I'm absolutely in love with her stuff, I wish she had her own homepage, but alas. One day when I'm rich enough to afford to buy some full priced art, I'm going to buy a few of hers. Also her work has really influenced my my linoprint work, and to some extent my painting, though there's always been a bit of a simularity in our pattern and texture, the influence of textiles. Anyway finish babbling and commence showing art...